8 May 2008
Houston, Texas

The light of reality

Dear Brothers and Sisters,

Our son Everett’s treatment for Ewing’s sarcoma of the pelvis was complicated last month by serious side effects of chemotherapy. Because his tumor had developed resistance to the first-line treatment, he had to receive a second-line regimen that was more toxic. His doctors watched him closely in the hospital as they administered the drugs. At first, Everett suffered only the usual side effects of depressed mental function, some kidney damage, and low blood cell counts; and later he was able to go home to recover from those. But then he developed painful ulcers in his gastrointestinal tract, fever over 104 degrees, and a bloodstream infection requiring intravenous antibiotics. Finally, the toxicity and accumulated stress pushed him into an acute psychosis, and he lost control of his thoughts and actions.

Everett lay on the floor of his bedroom as he descended into that mental abyss. I sat close by and talked with him, his thoughts becoming more and more delusional. He was rapidly losing his ability to relate to me in his usual ways. Perhaps my familiar words were for him a point of reference, or maybe it was just my presence as his father—but somehow in the midst of his deterioration he was able for a moment to see through the psychotic darkness and recognize the light of reality. With agonizing clarity, he reached up and pulled me to himself, clinging to me as he wept. I reminded him that I was the very first person to hold him when he was born, and that my arms were around him still.

Everett had to return to the hospital for a week while he recovered from the psychosis and other debilitating side effects of chemotherapy. He's much better now, and yesterday I knew for sure he was getting back to his old self when, at the lunch table, he and I broke into fits of laughter as we dreamed up mechanical remedies for loose motion. We were again relating to each other in our usual ways. We wanted to enjoy ourselves all we could before the next round of chemotherapy. That treatment started today, and Cindy is with Everett now at the MD Anderson Cancer Center as he receives the infusions. Because of what he suffered last month, his doctors have switched to a different set of drugs; and the treatment will be supplemented with doses of radiation. If all goes well, he may be able to undergo surgery in late June or July.

As Everett embarks on this next round of chemotherapy, we remember with gratitude all of you who have been for us points of reference in the midst of our surrounding chaos. From this dark abyss that we often fear is deeper still, we have seen you pointing us again and again towards the light of reality—the reality of God’s faithfulness. That is what keeps us going, those moments of clarity when we see, through you, God’s loving arms around us and understand that he has always been there and always will.

Yours,

Les

The 2008 Mission Yearbook for Prayer & Study, p. 89